“When we encourage new parents to ‘treasure these moments because they don’t last forever,’ we need to remember to also reassure them that they will survive these moments because they don’t last forever.” L.R. Knost

1. Baby boys get erections. That’s right; you heard me correctly. That is NOT something people warn you about before giving life to your beautiful bundle of blue.

2. The rush of love that we’re told of so often, might not be immediate. We expect this magical rush and sometimes it’s a gradual build up, and can take much longer. And that doesn’t make you a bad parent at all. It’s not abnormal either.

3. Bathing a new-born baby, without fully knowing what you’re doing, is like trying to wash an oiled up octopus. Damn are those little people slippery! And how are you meant to know how hot this bath is? Go for warm and pray for the best. No, don’t pray really… just use a bath thermometer!

4. You might THINK you can hear the baby crying whilst you are taking a shower/break. They’re not. Weird right? But I’m right… so don’t go jumping out covered in lathered up shampoo; you’re safe.

5. Newborn baby girls can have a small period a couple of days after being born… Bit of a shock factor to this if nobody warns you – but the reality is, this is just because of a withdrawal from the mother’s hormones she was accustomed to in the womb. Milk from their nipples and acne are also possible. 

6. Sleep deprivation feels like it can kill you, and that’s why it’s used as a torture technique. So… er, thanks little one. It does get better though; I promise. 

7. Finally, baby vests… they come with those strange sleeves right? Did you know that’s for when the baby does a GIANT poonami and you don’t want to drag all that messy poo over their head? Instead, the sleeves fold down so you can take it down the baby rather than up. Babies, you can thank me when you’re all grown up, for not being covered in seeded yellow poop after every single explosive nappy (very common occurrence)!

Written by Bethany Dempsey from www.thedempseydiaries.com for Home of Seven.